Ramblings of a year gone by...

Goodness me, it's twenty twenty three!

November already - madness!

I have learnt a few lessons this year, been through some friendships and relationship-type-ish experiences. I have had to detach myself from some people who were draining my energy and exhausting my kindness. I have also had a person I really liked, detach from myself due to my own inconsistent, passive aggressive and unclear communication. I realised I can't just react with my flippant comments and expect people to stick around.

HG is very good for reflecting and helping me see how my behaviour might affect others; my reactions and learned passive aggressiveness. It isn't hard to talk about or hear, but important to at least attempt to continue to work on oneself.

Other people I considered friends have shown a side of themselves which doesn't align with my own beliefs and values in fully supporting others in expressing, exploring and ffs just BEING. Three people now who consider themselves "Christians" have edged over into what appears to be a brain-washing, misinformed view; sometimes involving conspiracies etc.  It scares me and makes me sad, as well as losing faith in my ability to choose who to trust.

Another thing I am baffled by is how many people still tell me they wish to have children. Today, we had a lay-in, some awesome s3xy time then went for a peaceful and beautiful hike, went for brunch on our way home and have enjoyed a Saturday afternoon doing basically whatever the hell we like (besides general adulting chores!). It's quiet, the cats are gorgeous and the perfect therapy after a busy week. I wouldn't wanna give that up haha! I guess each to their own but the future of the planet is looking pretty bleak so maybe consider adoption. Just sayin'. I obviously love and respect all my friends and fam who are being fantazmic parents to fun, awesome little minions!  But I still don't get it.

Anyhoozle, I am in the swing of things, working at my local leisure centre... I moved from lifeguarding to the Personal Training & teaching classes. It's very fun, if tiring!
I hope that once we have a house, we can set up a gym - oooh HG has started using his work gym - once one week and twice last week! Shhh don't jinx it! :)
It'll be nice to train myself and other people in our own gym - I am manifesting!

Teaching classes is fun and it's nice when people personally thank/praise you and ask what other classes you teach. It's also really rewarding when PT clients tell you about their little wins and improvements! I also ran a park bootycamp this summer and a fitness class for some teachers after school.

I am learning dances (or should be!) for my dancepl3y instructor qualification.

We are still living in the same basement apartment - 9yrs now! 
In Canada for 10!

I'll add a few pics and catcha l8r! TTFN 

My friend Barbs from South Africa/UK :)

I love rowing!

October Rambles

 I sometimes think about how much a working parent has to do and I am... firstly baffled anyone would choose to take that on...! But secondly, I think about them having less time to do - anything - specifically "work" on themselves. This term "doing the work" is cropping up a lot lately. Which makes breeding/having children a fantastic distraction from working on yourself - and great for people who see it as 'what they are supposed to do'. Why work on yourself when you can just have kids and pass your trauma reactions, anxieties, coping mechanisms, etc. onto them?


As I drift through my life, I am bumping into (thanks to the Google/IG algorithms I'm sure) childfree stuff, and I follow a childfree coach (Holly) who is from USA but is living in Norway with her wife for a year. Holly has started a book club and I the book we are reading is quite thought triggering. Great specific advice for journaling - the most important action in the morning, when your subconscious and conscious wake up and are in their OPTIMAL CONDITION.

I don't have a morning routine and once again I'm being told it's what we need in order to operate from our 'peak state' - alongside having time away from your regular environment. I am feeling a longing for some time with me - maybe take a drive and visit a friend this week. 

I am 39, I feel like I should have this sussed. I don't drink coffee and that seems to be most people's 'morning routine'. Followed by a poop! 💩

My mornings consist of a variation of... bowel movements (1-3x between 4am and 9am), much meandering, often making HG's lunch and seeing him off, sorting bins on bin day, a work out before 10:30am, yoga, meditation, phonecalls, scrolling on my phone, chatting/typing to ppl on my phone. This is on the days that I am not working but HG (I currently have extra time because I cut back 2 jobs to make time for new, 3rd job, which is delayed due to new centre not being ready). On days we're both off, I have even less routine but we usually get outside for a little walk/hike. We'll often wake and have snuggles/sex on a weekend; it's so nice when nobody has to go/be anywhere. Then HG will game, I'll potter - housework, feed us, make a mess, clean up!
We'll play Magic the Gathering and hang out/watch TV.




So I just read that your favourite colour describes your personality... 
What is your favourite colour and why?
How do you feel about it?
Write it down and put I Am at the front.

Purple: Deep, dark, warm

Turquoise: Fun, bright & vibrant

I am deep
I am dark
I am warm
I am fun
I am bright
I am vibrant

I don't actually disagree with these.

Let me know if you try it too :D

How does anyone know what they are doing? 
Life flies by so fast!

Childfree Period Bliss

I was searching for blog names... and from typing in The Childfree Parent (my current mini project; I'll have a new one next week!!)... I came across these, without even trying...


https://ifstudies.org/blog/does-having-children-make-people-happier-in-the-long-run

https://www.wired.com/story/how-we-reproduce-childfree/


It's becoming more common (in the Western world) to question whether or not we should be having children. So much of what we are told each day points to Why The Fuck would you do that...

* Temperature of Earth is rising.
* Icebergs melting, fires, hurricanes, floods.... not sure how much more evidence is required.

Apparently, having a child multiplies your carbon footprint by 400%

Not to mention the added impacts...
* Destroy your body
* Erase all chances of peaceful sleep
* Trample on your sex life
* Mess up your house/car

Reasons to reproduce:
* To see what a mini me would look/be like
* To have a small being who relies on me for the next X number of years. Or who ends up having to care for me.
* Sorry these are still geared towards being childfree...
* To experience pregnancy (but have my body fucked up)


----------------------------------------------

I started this a few days ago.
Today I have period cramps.

Bittersweet.
So happy just to have my cycle after cancer treatment!

Have a good day <3

Before you reproduce...

I love this country! 

There are so many things I want to talk about.
I am tempted to begin a new blog for parenting ideas, advice etc.

As a childfree person, I have - obviously - questioned re-creating. Between HG and I, we have discussed and mulled it over from all angles.
Basically, the things we most like doing don't comfortably include children.
Now as I'm sitting here, I'm thinking 'but they are only children for....' how many years?

I think we/young people don't really begin to have much of a clue - in general - what they are doing, until they reach at least 25 years of age.
That's a lot of time and energy. 💟

The more people, friends and soooo many guys I speak to who have young children tell me repeatedly, how their partner's sex drive is way off course from their own. I understand mothers (often times) are tired, overworked and unappreciated - parenting is largely an endless, thankless job, let's be honest. But I think if anyone deserves/needs sexual pleasure, it's mothers. Do yourself a favour and let your husband devour you. 👅

Love this lil bean.

Tangent:

The toddler I nanny for has started giving me genuine, unprompted thank yous for doing things for her - or when she finds out I had done/given her something. It honestly makes my day and lightens my heart.



There are many children who need caring for (I feel lucky to be welcomed and included into a supported/supportive, cultured, intellectual family).
Yet people keep popping sprogs.

I don't intend to offend - I know most of my friends are doing/will do a fantastic job of bringing caring, planet-loving, respectful little people into this world.

In the back of my head I just keep hearing... "twelve harvests left..."

Things aren't happening fast enough. Everything - EVERYTHING - (ok not everything) is still being made with plastic.

Bank cards, razors, toothbrushes, most containers...

...because (never start a sentence with because) (avoid using never/always 👧) ...
BECAUSE the people at the top are dickheads - often with psychopathic tendencies (lacking empathy - giving no shits about who gets hurt) - are in cahoots with the oil/petrol companies. Plastic is made from oil. I wonder if everyone knows that.
What I don't understand is what they think their own offspring are going to live on.

Adventuring with my man.

I also wonder what effect it will have to keep removing bits, pieces, liquids etc from the earth and it's core. Humans don't deserve this planet & it's creatures.
Then they seem surprised by earthquakes, storms etc. A'doyyyy!

In 20 to 50 years, who knows; maybe we'll all have to wear masks every time we leave the house.
Maybe we won't be able to swim in the seas, lakes, rivers, waterfalls anymore.


Anyway... breathe... another blog, another time...

Ugh.

Back to the sex drive topic - I'm not saying sex is the most important part of a relationship/marriage, but I find it can have a lot to do with intimacy, affection, belonging & connection, as much as the actual act of sex itself. I also know of women who's male partners are not interested in sex or have a low sex drive.



My initial reason for this topic was...

What are people's reasons for reproducing?

Do they think about their reasons? Feel free to drop me any ideas/answers!

GTG.

I love you xx

P.S edit - adding snaps :)

Happy place!

Chemo curls

Beautiful moth

  

Who Where What Am I? Absorbing...

Rediscover....

The original purpose of my blog was, as the title suggests, was to write about what I'm learning.

I had definitely lost sight of any direction - story of my life!

We're all on a journey... some have more certainty about where they want to or are headed.

I drift along. I meet people and absorb them - taking good, bad and naughty as I go. I am bad at saying no. I go with the flow.

This year has been a bumble of fitness activity...
I firstly achieved my goal of actively doing a yoga class (online) every day for 30 days. This became a chore at times (i.e. after a 13hr work day), but I still loved every moment 'on the mat'. I have still been doing yoga each week, but not every day. (www.yogawithadriene.com)
Oh, I also explored veganism, but as with my ADD life, continued to go with the flow and eat a healthy balance of what's readily available in my world (i.e work, HG), but a little more conscientiously.

I then found a 4wk eating plan by Betty Rocker, for $40 instead of $100... I have cooked a few things from the first week, but need to download week 2-4 :P (This was Feb, it's now April.)

A girl I follow on Instagram, who I loveeeee - talks about making sex and self loving much less taboo. (I think I need to write a sex/erotica blog... hmmmm!). Anyway, this cool chick was giving away her sexual self love online course/programme for free. So I signed up for that - AND a chat group for yoga lovers, with Adriene. (I haven't participated either - just received thousands of emailssss gah.)

At around the same time, a friend I'd recently started chatting to more (Scottish but lives back in Anglias), had recommended another online option - www.dailyom.com.

I signed up (option of paying $10, $20 or $30) and have been doing the 20 day challenge - Fit & Fierce over 40 (although I'm not 40 for 3yrs). I'm on Day 16 and I started it about 3 weeks ago :D I do it here and there. I was trying to do consecutive days - and will try again this week - but there is also a page of reading to do each day, so I like to make time for it. She (Sadi Nardini) follows a daily topic, with a quick inspiration video, a recipe and a written self-reflection/development exercise, as well as the 20min work out - during which, she uses the same few warm-ups & cool downs repeated, with a fresh snippit in the middle - they are nice little workouts. Kinda intensive yoga :) It's a pretty good deal.

So all others fell to the wayside and this latter is the one I've been doing. It's always helpful to ask questions/figure/be aware of whats going on with oneself.

Also this year, I have been discovering, befriending and learning from some other women on Instagram (definitely my favourite app - photos are still my favourite). The most recent, are a beautiful group who support and encourage each other. I have a couple of (newish) irl friends, who see and take guidance from a naturopath. 

I have heard and read mention of Mercury being in Retrograde... I skimmed over it all a few time, then looked into it. I am trying to pay attention to interactions etc.
Because Mercury is the planet situated closest to the Sun, its orbit is much shorter than Earth’s. About three or four times a year, Mercury speeds past Earth, and that is when we experience a Mercury retrograde period. If you were in a car and another car passed you, you could tell it was going faster than you. But if it slowed down and you then passed it, it would appear that that car was actually going backward. Then when the other car speeds up and passes you again, it kicks up all of the dust in the road. As Mercury speeds by, it is like a train flying past, creating a powerful, turbulent gust of “wind” in its wake. The turbulence and disruption Mercury creates when it retrogrades can affect what we feel on Earth in our everyday lives.
https://www.astrologyzone.com/everything-you-need-to-know-about-mercury-retrograde/

These ladies, who love being outside in nature, adore and show gratitude to mother earth - appreciate this planet.
The girl I have known first/most is also re-approaching her Zero Waste journey. I have so so so so much time for people making the effort to start to save this beautiful planet and it's creatures.


Tangent:
I suppose my most loved topics (on IG) are Zero Waste, Childfree, Travel - seeing people's views of the world and then there's my kinky, wild, sexual side (which used to have it's own account, but now gets mostly suppressed or embraced through other avenues).
These peeps are also users/believers in crystals - linked with energy; combined with tarot(?) cards, candles etc. - I still am unsure but very interested in learning (not so much about cards). People were putting out their washed crystals out for the full moon to renew and cleanse the energy. Fascinating.

This is a long enough ramble and I finally hit my original point.

Lots to learn. I'm also reading about alignment (of the human body) - I am definitely interested in ways to help me grow old whilst staying strong. If I die sooner, that's cool, but I intend to do what I can to avoid being in pain.

Oh also, I have been attending a triathlon group and have registered for my first race this summer!!

I'll be swimming the 4km race again for a charity I know personally and possibly the more local (sprint) triathlon. Weeehooo!

And maybe a Rubic's Cube Party again - for my 37th Birthday! Byeeee! Thanks for reading this far!


Yesterday in Parry Sound...

Last Week... the view from our drive.

Coffee vs Sleep

I don't like coffee. I don't understand why 90% people seem to. Especially here in American-influenced Canada (not meaning this offensively; tis the way of tings).

Before I get started on the waste of disposable, one-use cups, I would be annoyed with myself, if I had such a dependency on something (people use a variety of drugs to get through the day) that I'd join a line of cars, queing down the road, for a drink of brown fluid... there are endless jokes and memes about not approaching people before they've had their first cup of java.

There has been a lot of talk (in my influence/discovery circle anyway), about Self-Love. One way to love oneself, which comes up repeatedly - and which I can now monitor, thanks to my FeeBee, my Fitbit (or FilBert, I'm undecided!) - is to provide yourself with the opportunity to rest, relax and sleep. Sleep can add years to your life... through our decision to refrain from having children, the only things keeping us awake are our nocturnal outdoor kitty, outdoor noises (minimal since the school has been finished & we got double glazing) and the neighbour getting nailed upstairs!

A recent discussion with HG lead to the idea that people who are maybe less than content with their current position/circumstances (life) etc. don't sleep as well. I'd add that health may lead to more/less sleep too. A catch 22: unhappiness leads to less sleep and less sleep (could potentially) lead to further unhappiness.

I understand it's easier said than done to 'get more sleep'.

Russell Brand says that meditation is what saves him from himself each day... in not so many words... I'm hearing similar things more and more... and am totally in love with yoga - I'd thunk up a blog on the topic...

Anyway I'll sign off. HG said I would offend people by questioning/dissing coffee - it's so many people's crutch.

Whatever. Maybe some people will question it. idc
Or at least work on using a reusable cup - we need companies to enable, support and encourage such behaviour!

TTFN my lovelies xXx

HG birthday meal - The Mill on Main, Huntsville

HG & Puss :)

Adventure hike 11/03/18

Blast from the Past... 2009ish?

Me a la weekend :D

Yesterday's Ice Cave - Breathtaking!!

P.S.
Mini update on last blog - I know mine never flow!

I did, gently encourage the Mum to let bubs sleep... he has been getting increasingly better at sleeping for longer etc. Last I knew he was improving, however I haven't worked for them for the past 2-3 weeks.

A Journey of Friendships and Loves

I miss my friends. My school/old friends with whom I can mess about, say what I want and always have fun, every time we get together.

It's taken me a while but I'm starting to meet people here in Canada with whom I can feel comfortable (enough to be my wacky self). Gradually enough time passes; I've been working at the casino as a bartender/server for one year today and I have been integrated into the 'work family'; with many I am past the basic facts/getting to know you stage and with other I don't care too much. I am super friendly and encouraging though and they seem to enjoy/appreciate having me around. One Asian server colleague calls me "Mrs Happy".

My school friends appear to acknowledge my existence about once every 3 months... for my "best" friend, I was disowned for about a year after we left England. Cheers bud. I'm not sure things will be the same again, but I do miss him & his hubby and their home which became my/our sanctuary. My oldest/historical best friend (since 7yrs old) emails me occasionally but hasn't ever been amazing at communication though we still love each other dearly and won't shut up nattering while we're together.

Terrible photo! 27th May 2000 (my 19th birthday) :0) 

Other, scattered friends are treasured for sure. I wish I could gather everyone I love spending time with and have them in one place!

The history, memories, fun times and experiences we have with people can't be sped up... interactions happen at their own speed. I sometimes wonder if my "best friends" are just my oldest friends; through a history of many shared moments. Or maybe there are categories of "best friends"... anyway who gives a shit? :-D

Due to not having children, HG and I inevitably end up hanging out with younger peeps; usually in their 20s. However, we have spent time recently with peeps in their 30s/40s who either don't want 'kids' or don't want them yet. It's been really refreshing to hang out with others who understand and respect our way of thinking and choice of lifestyle. The good thing also, with the service industry, is that workers often enjoy a good lay-in and get it, rather than seeing us as lazy for staying in bed until 12pm, despite going to bed between 3-5am (combo of work and choice).

I can't help feeling that, despite my old group of friends now reuniting themselves more frequently, my feelings towards them have changed. When/if we do ever live closer again, what will our relationship(s) be like? Being away means new phases in friendships etc. I have found people communicating via messaging aps/services, whom I maybe didn't chat so much to while we were in UK. Others, as I mentioned, have drifted off - nobody's fault; some people need to see me in person and others are better with phone calls (which are less than simple with phone cards, skype, time differences/costs... altho seriously, no excuses. Come On!).

Feck I'm boring myself so I'll be off!

Here's a pic of our handsome fur baby and one of our delicious whip!

Can't get enough of either of them!!

I'm sorry if my life choices disappoint you...

Started on 7th November 2014...

I recently commented on a humorous 'childfree' page. I like many of their posts because I can relate, however some people take things too far i.e baby hating.

I like babies, love children and am amused/stimulated/frustrated/amazed by teenagers, however I feel very misunderstood and isolated much of the time; especially now I'm working as a bartender/server. I am (it is believed by the general population, aka my customers, that) I am of the age where I should have offspring and if I don't then it should definitely be on the horizon. A man recently asked me "what else will you have?" when I said HG and I had no intention of reproducing. If pushed, I'll suggest possible adoption... but not for many years and only if we notice a huge child-sized gap in our lives (unlikely).

Sidenote:
My gut instinct tells me the most likely occurrence would be to home a child who comes into our lives at the right time for everyone involved. It feels kinda natural but we'll see.


So, getting back on track, my comment was in response to the image to the left. The fact that I had commented, seemingly, (unbeknownst to me) advertised itself on social media site of choice and I received a message from my sister-in-law, asking if I had been child-bashing again... I responded expressing my frustration in the fact that Facebook advertises that stuff in my 'friends'' newsfeeds, without my knowledge or permission, and that I wasn't "child bashing" but merely contributing my own personal experiences (within a forum where I felt understood).

There's not much I keep super private, however being outspoken on this topic and regarding my childfree beliefs has lead to a few precarious predicaments with friends and family in the past. I've found it's easier to stay quiet, although I am me, and therefore this doesn't always happen IRL.
Parents are ridiculously overprotective of their offspring after all.


I realised, recognised and acknowledged recently, that it's a pretty lonely position when 95% of people I speak to about it are baffled. Facial expressions are similar to those in response to being told I live in a pineapple under the sea and have a pet seahorse (ok maybe not quite; I'll work on a better example). I'm in the minority.

Along my journey, I have met the odd person who either feels the same as HG & me (very very few); feels the same but for different reasons (i.e not wanting body stretched) or who understand but still plan to have children themselves. The group of people who I find have the most understanding, respect and admiration are those (usually women) who have had children but maybe earlier than would've planned to, with the 'wrong person' or in a way in which they didn't feel that had full control. The process of creating a child is very simple; it's not rocket science and it doesn't take much thought or intelligence; it's one of our primitive instincts. Mothers have told me that they fully understand my decision and that although they love and by no means regret having their child/ren, if they could go back and have their time again, they would skip having children, or wait until they were ready/with the right partner.

I am crazily lucky to have my life-partner by my side with thoughts and feelings almost exact to mine (we spent a good amount of our first few years together pondering life, birth, death and how to achieve the things we had agreed meant most to us i.e. fun, travel, sex and sleep). Things we don't agree on, we are pretty darn good at discussing and compromising on.

I also feel much less alone when Google finds me like-minded people who care about the planet and future generations enough to bypass having their own children.

"I’m not having kids because I can’t in good conscience contribute to the rapid diminishment of our world. If I were to have kids, their quality of life would be less than mine, and I don’t want to condemn them to that. Surprisingly, I’ve been told that I’m selfish, unwilling to share my life with a child. Look at it this way: I’m leaving more resources for your child."

http://www.forbes.com/sites/ericagies/2011/10/31/why-im-not-having-kids-and-you-shouldnt-either/

Another excellent article which shares a few of my notions:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/sezin-koehler/8-reasons-why-im-not-having-children-childfree_b_5705311.html

Oh and one more superb read...:
http://intentious.com/2012/10/29/i-regret-having-children-so-do-you-you-just-wont-say-it/

Childfree(dom)

After meeting, HG and I discussed in depth... well we discussed everything actually; and discovered that our morals and beliefs were very similar. Others, we have discovered and explored together, sometimes debating and having varying views.


We seemed to happily tumble into the increasingly reinforced agreement that:
* It suited us to live without kids (and they are pretty annoying, a lot of the time)
* Humans disgust us with their treatment of this precious planet
* We enjoy traveling and exploring new places/things
* We love being outdoors and enjoying the less disturbed areas (enhanced by smoking weed)
* We love lay-ins and lazy days (I used to be out of bed by 9am everyday) & being together
* We love going where we want, whenever we want
* We love having a kitty around!
* We love being carefree and impulsive
* We embrace an alternative routine and enjoy long/late nights

4am Blogging Assistant

I also knew, thru my chosen career path (initiating with studying Criminology to satisfy my curiosity about how offenders end up being such); working for:
* Social Services (including child protection)
* Residential care homes for teenagers (privately run, predominantly teenage girls)
* Youth Justice/parenting support/groups to strengthen families


...that there are enough children already living in the world, who would benefit massively from being given a loving home. {I'm familiar with the ins and outs enough to know that this is a fantasy dreamland - it's not that easy to rescue a child and things don't always go to plan or as hunky dory as one would hope}.

As more and more of the people I know continue to reproduce, and through some disgruntled parents, I have learnt not to publicise (on FB) my feelings, thoughts and views... because parents are like big grumpy mumma bears and take it as a personal insult to them/their pooping noise makers. [Hehe I am joking - I love babies, small people, pre-teens, teens, 20-eens, etc... just not 24hrs a day.] Tom and I recently agreed that it's maybe become fashionable to be SO protective of your offspring. The majority of people I know having sprogs I respect and trust to raise their little one(s) to be as planet-loving as possible...however it is said that having a child increases your 'carbon footprint' by 400% (reason #15 for not having children).

In person, many people are either understanding or curious when the topic (and my views) arise; and I can give a different reason to about 10 people. Sometimes I find myself becoming preachy - and I believe so deeply that people should simply consider not having children instead of assuming it is part of their future (societies/families/females/wanna-be dads' expectations). I read a blog this evening that explains a few of my thoughts/feelings. I felt so grateful and as if someone finally understood. The link is added below.

It's not that I don't want kids. My body has definitely craved it in the past and I would love to have a child. My reasons for having one are:
* To experience pregnancy and giving birth
* To see what/who it would look like
* To watch it grow, develop, learn and absorb into a little version of us
* To assess my skills as a parent (I've done so much training & supporting that I almost feel I know too much about how hard it is to do it 'right')
* To know that I could (atm ideally I couldn't; then contraception could be erased from my life)
* To have maternity leave (i.e paid time off)


I have many more reasons to not have children and people don't argue when I list them.

My views are long, wide and vast but I'm sleepy right now and don't wanna end up with yet another started-but-not-posted blog entry.

Thanks for stopping by :0)





READ THIS:
http://thenotmom.com/growing-older-and-growing-up-child-free/

Bean On Bored

People have had signs in their cars for years now, notifying us all that they have a baby/small person/princess/some kind of small child-like item travelling as a passenger in their vehicle.

Now, my background of work experience and knowledge, as many of my cringing friends and family know, combined with my 'lack of inner-monologue' occasionally gets me into a bit of a pickle. I studied Social Care followed by Criminology & Criminal Justice, due to my endless inquisition of human beans. What makes people do the things they do? How can behaviour be explained by a combination of genetics and environmental factors? Through my experiences of Social Work, Residential Children's Homes and Youth Justice, there is little that shocks me. There is very little that a human somewhere in the world isn't capable of... ok I'm losing myself now!

I used to want to 'save the world'. I have no idea where I got the idea from that the world was so bad and needed saving - perhaps it began when I desperately wanted to rescue a Romanian orphan. Which a teacher at our school did. He was my hero - even more than he had been before. So I had decided that Police work was the way forward - they sort out "bad" people, however this never felt right because I empathised with the 'criminals' too much. I used to think "what has happened to you to result in you taking these actions?".

So my own wandering thoughts became combined with my experiences of the shit deal some children end up with (which turns shittier when they become 18yrs old and have less support and harsher consequences - yet have missed out on ever being made to feel worthwhile).

Discussed many times with my husband, over our 6.5yrs together, we repeatedly end up agreeing that we could have a ridiculously good life with much less hassle and stress, if we skipped the whole reproducing part of society's expectations.

If I could create a law, it would be for people to be at least 25yrs old before they can have a child. However, others aren't as keen to learn more about the world and themselves as I am!


So how does this relate to the original heading?! What a round-about route I take - are you even still reading?!

What makes people go out and buy those signs?

HG: I hate those 'baby on board' signs.
Me: How come?
HG: Why do you think people feel the need to advertise that they have a baby/child on board?
Me: Ummm to remind/encourage other road users to drive carefully?
HG: Why wouldn't drivers be doing this anyway?

HG has a way of stretching my brain. I didn't have an answer, so asked for his thoughts. He suggested that the signs were a way of announcing fertility.
All I could picture was this:

I have since researched this and the Telegraph online tells me that the signs are designed to alert the emergency vehicles as to where there might be small people requiring assistance as a priority. Firstly, the Telegraph says they are actually causing accidents (see below:)
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/motoring/news/9599881/Baby-on-board-stickers-cause-one-in-20-accidents.html

Secondly, I Googled deeper and found that others are irritated by the signs too. One lady, due to her struggle to procreate herself, sees it as a boasting advert for what she can't have. This leads my thoughts to alcoholics and how signs advertising alcohol must torment them.
http://barrenblog.blogspot.co.uk/2008/03/barren-womans-hate-list-item-7-baby-on.html


So anyway, this lady's blog reminds me once again how suitable our decision is - why waste your time worrying about how close to 30 you're getting and (once there), when you'll finally have a baby of your own... when life is passing you by and there is more than plenty to enjoy without a crying, pooey, demanding bundle of ball-and-chain?
It frustrates the hell out of me when older ladies tilt their heads to one side and say "well... you've got time to change your mind; you're still young...".

Don't get me wrong, I love children, but I know (maybe too much) what a high proportion of the next generation are doomed for and it doesn't make me eager to contribute.

I also know that I'm very lucky to have found a husband who tickles, pleases, stimulates and challenges me; meaning I don't feel I have a gap in my life which needs filling with a wriggling bundle of goo-goo-ga-ga. I will happily play a positive part in the lives of the children around me, and enjoy watching them grow and develop into little adults. I do my part in helping the Teenagers (they deserve a capital letter) already born into this world and finding it a struggle; and those who are developing unhelpful learned behaviours and to have a sense of entitlement, despite their negative actions.

All we can do is live our lives to the best of our ability - taking into account the planet's needs and the needs of those around us. This is sadly difficult in a world where it's difficult to find the truth.

http://www.co-operative.coop/join-the-revolution/our-plan/inspiring-young-people/truth-about-youth/

Goodness me, this is an essay. Sorry!