October Rambles

 I sometimes think about how much a working parent has to do and I am... firstly baffled anyone would choose to take that on...! But secondly, I think about them having less time to do - anything - specifically "work" on themselves. This term "doing the work" is cropping up a lot lately. Which makes breeding/having children a fantastic distraction from working on yourself - and great for people who see it as 'what they are supposed to do'. Why work on yourself when you can just have kids and pass your trauma reactions, anxieties, coping mechanisms, etc. onto them?


As I drift through my life, I am bumping into (thanks to the Google/IG algorithms I'm sure) childfree stuff, and I follow a childfree coach (Holly) who is from USA but is living in Norway with her wife for a year. Holly has started a book club and I the book we are reading is quite thought triggering. Great specific advice for journaling - the most important action in the morning, when your subconscious and conscious wake up and are in their OPTIMAL CONDITION.

I don't have a morning routine and once again I'm being told it's what we need in order to operate from our 'peak state' - alongside having time away from your regular environment. I am feeling a longing for some time with me - maybe take a drive and visit a friend this week. 

I am 39, I feel like I should have this sussed. I don't drink coffee and that seems to be most people's 'morning routine'. Followed by a poop! 💩

My mornings consist of a variation of... bowel movements (1-3x between 4am and 9am), much meandering, often making HG's lunch and seeing him off, sorting bins on bin day, a work out before 10:30am, yoga, meditation, phonecalls, scrolling on my phone, chatting/typing to ppl on my phone. This is on the days that I am not working but HG (I currently have extra time because I cut back 2 jobs to make time for new, 3rd job, which is delayed due to new centre not being ready). On days we're both off, I have even less routine but we usually get outside for a little walk/hike. We'll often wake and have snuggles/sex on a weekend; it's so nice when nobody has to go/be anywhere. Then HG will game, I'll potter - housework, feed us, make a mess, clean up!
We'll play Magic the Gathering and hang out/watch TV.




So I just read that your favourite colour describes your personality... 
What is your favourite colour and why?
How do you feel about it?
Write it down and put I Am at the front.

Purple: Deep, dark, warm

Turquoise: Fun, bright & vibrant

I am deep
I am dark
I am warm
I am fun
I am bright
I am vibrant

I don't actually disagree with these.

Let me know if you try it too :D

How does anyone know what they are doing? 
Life flies by so fast!

Covid - Wave II (actually nothing about C-19).

It's October in 2 days. 

The munchkin I look after turns 4yrs on 1st October. I wonder what her world will look like in 20, 30, 40yrs time.... I hope to know her for many of them.

 

Here is a leaf I caught, Katy Bowman stylie!
https://www.nutritiousmovement.com/

So the past week or so has been peppered with periods of training; some full days - on Zoom (the new normal way of the world - no time travelling movie predicted this.... or did they?), then at the weekend we were in the new pool/s.

I love the physical training; I was so fkn tired by Saturday night! We practiced rescues, situations, swam 400m in 10mins (7.39), retrieved bricks/mannikins from bottom of pool (13.5ft) and lots lots more.

That evening,HG and I walked and picked up Mexican Food. HG played Pokemon on the way home. We watched some telly and played a game of Magic the Gathering. Then I worked on my lesson plan for Sunday, which probably could've taken me 15mins but I procrastinate, dawdle and send people things they need to complete theirs!

My garden is doing well. I kinda ignore it this time of year; just water it if it doesn't rain for a few days. 
The Morning Glories are in full swing. But I'm bringing my marijuana plant in each night.

I am enjoying one day a week with the girly I nanny/care for. Her Mum was devastated when I said I wanted to cut down hours and focus on something else - lifeguarding/swim instruction, but she gets it and she loves me and I get to spend her birthday with girly this week so I'm excited about that!

I love to teach her (A) about life and nature and the world. I know she would/will be fine without my input; her family are so articulate and balanced with minumal screentime (like almost zero until Covid/Zoom school). But I love watching her grow & being a part of it (without full responsibility of another being).


I took her to a corn field recently, to show her how corn grows. I told her about how as children, on family walks, I would run with my cousins through the corn fields (alongside a path/trail) and my Uncle would sometimes shout, pretending to be a farmer telling us off. 😂 My younger cousins would be screaming and crying. 😆

I take her to the woods and the beach. 

We look around at bugs and leaves.
She's still annoyingly scared of spider webs though!

I gave her a t-shirt about a year & a half ago, which says

I Love Nature. 

And she does. It's getting tight on her but it's still true! 💚

   

I haven't been working out AS much, with 12hr shifts and whatevs but I'm not beating myself up about it! Fitting it in where I can. 

Even managed a wee lake swim (20℃ in the water).

The air was 7℃. It was deliciously therapeutic.

   



Autumn is upon us and I want to envelop all the sights, smells and feels 🍁🍂🍃

 

Our final Tuesday evening (Triathlon Club) bike ride. 

 

  

Until next time,
Be kind to each other ❤

👩

Black Lives Matter: Enough is enough

It STILL baffles me, that even as a child I knew everyone was even/equal... (Why wouldn't we be?!) yet governments and systems and other dumbasses don't yet get it.

My white privilege allows me to have thought, in the past, "but I don't see colour".
If you'd asked me about my friends, race isn't what I would use describe them.

WE ARE CURRENTLY IN THE MIDST OF A PANDEMIC - where everyone is hiding from an enemy they can't see - AND A WAR AGAINST RACISM - an on-going PANDEMIC.

Black people & their allies should NOT still be having to fight this war so far down the line... although Rosa Parks (born in 1913) only died in 2005 - refusing to give up her seat on the (segregated) bus in 1955. So in my parents' lifetime, things have adjusted slightly. But things are still so far from fair.

I heard that the US police was created to "protect white women from black men". They arrived violent, 300yrs ago and still aren't treating POC with the respect they deserve.

Things are changing rapidly at the moment; I am sure more will have changed by tomorrow, but I wanted to log my thoughts at this time.

What a mad time to be 39 (and 4 days).

Cities in America are protesting. From what I've seen, (non-uniformed) police and WHITE fucktard youths have been starting/causing any trouble i.e damaging property.

It's like 75% of us know what's right and needs to change (is it that high or am I niave?) - but the POLICE were driving through/into crowds of people.
Firing tear gas randomly - but only at black people.
Are you trying to ProVe your racism???

What The Actual Fuck.

Enough is enough.

But how can things change when the people in charge are the ones keeping things this way?

Ramblings of a Tuesday afternoon.

I really wanted to write or type every day starting 1st Feb.... or read - which I have been doing every day, because library books come with a deadine!!

I'm reading Sex at Dawn and Notes on a Nervous Planet.

As I went to begin this bloggerooo, I received an email, which I checked on my phone (I recently turned on notifications because I was missing emails etc.). It's an email about volunteering for the games... so I went to answer it. But wait. Bubble wait.



I am also listening to a podcast: My Dad Wrote a Porno.

So fuckin' funny :D

Anyhoo... I may have an interview about providing special support for a young person, possibly with an intellectual disability.
I didn't get another job I applied for, but am happy for the lady who did, who will be supervising me.

I am going to be volunteering for the Winter Olympics and Mariposa Folk Festival :D



I must dash, I have walked to the gym today and had a nice work out with a bunch o ladies!
Step aerobics ftw!

Walked home, pottered, had furnace guys round... (upstairs wasn't getting heat).
Ate avo on toast. Shower la de daaaaah.

HG is coming and we're going to the pet shop.

Chat laters gators :)

Childfree Period Bliss

I was searching for blog names... and from typing in The Childfree Parent (my current mini project; I'll have a new one next week!!)... I came across these, without even trying...


https://ifstudies.org/blog/does-having-children-make-people-happier-in-the-long-run

https://www.wired.com/story/how-we-reproduce-childfree/


It's becoming more common (in the Western world) to question whether or not we should be having children. So much of what we are told each day points to Why The Fuck would you do that...

* Temperature of Earth is rising.
* Icebergs melting, fires, hurricanes, floods.... not sure how much more evidence is required.

Apparently, having a child multiplies your carbon footprint by 400%

Not to mention the added impacts...
* Destroy your body
* Erase all chances of peaceful sleep
* Trample on your sex life
* Mess up your house/car

Reasons to reproduce:
* To see what a mini me would look/be like
* To have a small being who relies on me for the next X number of years. Or who ends up having to care for me.
* Sorry these are still geared towards being childfree...
* To experience pregnancy (but have my body fucked up)


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I started this a few days ago.
Today I have period cramps.

Bittersweet.
So happy just to have my cycle after cancer treatment!

Have a good day <3